I recently found some old notebooks I’d forgotten about. Pages filled with ramblings and unsent words to people who used to matter. I’m trying to acknowledge emotions right now and writing these up and putting them here is my way of starting. 2014 I want to burn. Feel the heat of a flame in a…
Maybe Life Isn’t Worth It
Hey , how have you been? Are you well? Great so lately i’ve been thinking about how i, and everyone else, would be better off if i just you know, died. Hey so i’m thinking about killing myself. Well not technically. I want to put myself in a dangerous situation that will hopefully result in…
December thoughts
I need to admit this to myself, if not to anyone else. I haven’t gone to sleep before 1am since the end of September. That’s not me just procrastinating- that’s me in bed eyes shut willing myself to go to sleep but then there’s just nothing and I am wide awake. Even when I didn’t…
no.3
Young, foolish, naïve, splendid Tranquil moments in lapses of ecstasy. I bathed in moments of your happy Drank down the memories Drowned in the lust. I felt every word Valued all the promises. Magnificent words to coat the knife That cut me up.
some poem no. 2
I was fire Dulled by your will. I was fear Freed by your compliments. I was numb Felt by your hands But I was dead And you let me fall.
some poem
You kiss me cliché butterflies Reminisce in those dark under eyes Grasping a feeling that no longer reigns Holding onto water and knowing pain. Fire work veins calling bloody names Sweet ashes mourn those better days.
Letters to every guy who has impacted me ‘to all the boys i’ve loved before’
In the style of ‘to all the boys I’ve loved before’ here are my ramblings to any guys I’ve had remote feelings for. I won’t name you, but for my own benefit I wanted to get this out of my system. I’ve not been in love with you all. We were never anything other than…
October thoughts
It’s been almost year since I felt remotely like this. I desperately tried to reach out and do things with friends, but all they said was that they’re busy. Then didn’t try to suggest when they were free. It’s okay I can take the hint. You don’t like me much. I’ll stop bothering you all….
Sins of the heart 